It has only taken 18 years...

Excitement can't even begin to describe what we are feeling! After 18 years--it has finally begun!!!! On Tuesday morning Greg and I took a half day--personal day to be home when the builder came to stake out our new house!  We trudged through the snow--or rather skated across the top of it--in order to work with the builder in choosing the placement and angle of the house. G and I had gone out on Sunday afternoon (and really did trudge through the snow and slush) in that beautiful, freakishly warm, 60 degree weather--to do a preliminary stake out. All that slush froze solid when the temperature plummeted on Monday--creating the skating rink that will soon be our home! I've finally allowed myself to get excited! After staking out the house--I was standing in what will eventually be my kitchen--and can I just say--the view out the kitchen window is AMAZING!!! Beautiful, tranquil farms and fields forever!! I never thought I'd say this--but I am almost looking forward to doing dishes!!!

When we got home from work Wednesday evening--we were greeted by equipment that had been dropped off in the yard--and reality set in!! This is really happening!! When we pulled into the driveway and parked--we just sat in the car for a while and stared at the big blue "spot a pot" or "job johnny" that had been placed in front of our parking space. We were both in disbelief. We were finally going to get our dream house!

Coming home from work on Thursday—was just as exciting-- equipment and piles of dirt!! They had been there that day to clear the icy snow from our property and put in the driveway. It now looks like a real construction site! They are supposed to "brake ground" and dig out the basement on Tuesday--however--the forecast of yet another storm Sunday into Monday will delay that date I'm sure. That's fine--we've waited this long--what's another couple of days!!!

Each day seems to bring us something new—I’m sure anxiety and frustration are lurking around the corner—after all—this is the second house we've had built—so we know the drill—but for now we are going to bask in the joy and excitement of our dream coming true! We are so blessed.

To change the subject--and shift to my recovery and me—I am six and a half weeks post op and I feel incredible! I have been back to work/school for two weeks.  It is just what the doctor ordered! I am so lucky to love my job! That first Monday back I was greeted by so many e-mails and visits from colleagues welcoming me back. I was flower bombed by an unknown assailant (Karen Fedder—you can’t fool me!) However—the best gift was all the students who stopped by to say “Hey”—their way of saying welcome back—it really took me aback. I knew that the students I had in class last semester knew I was gone—but had no idea so many others would notice my absence. 

My progress seems really slow—to me. During the preparation for surgery—those six months of classes and meetings--they constantly stressed how quickly the weight will come off during the first six months—well—it has been two weeks since my follow-up appointment with the surgeon and as of this morning--I have only dropped one 1.2 pounds. Normally I would say—“that’s not bad” but considering the fact that I am only eating 800 calories a day—that seems unbelievable! I have increased my activity and have been walking in school after hours—I’m up to 2 miles. I can’t say that this is a set bak--or has me discouraged—I am just really surprised! I know that this is a journey—one that is going to take a long time and I am in it for the long haul!!

I am pleased to report that this whole process has not been as hard as I thought it would be—Most days are just down right easy—although my days are now consumed with planning what to eat, prepping my miniature meals, keeping track of what I’m eating in My Fitness Pal, and finally--when to eat and when to drink or not drink. Don’t get me wrong—there are times that I feel plain sad--not depressed—just sad.  When those rare occasions surface—they obviously revolve around food--foods that I can’t eat yet (or may not be able to eat again)—or situations involving food.  It’s unfortunate that as a society—so much of our socialization with friends and loved ones revolves around food. When those moments of sadness surface—they don’t last long—as all I need to do is look at the big picture and I snap right out of it. I know that in time—my life will get back to normal as far as food goes—or should I say “will get back to my new normal as far as food goes.” 

I continue to be so thankful for all of your support and love—it has made this journey so much easier and enjoyable—to know that I am not traveling it alone!

Until next time…
Peace

                                                         

Post-op Appointment...a Big Success

I am SO excited!!! I had my post-op appointment on Friday February 14th--four weeks after my operation--. It was originally scheduled for Thursday the 13th but was rescheduled to Friday--due to the snowstorm. After waiting an hour (obviously, I was not the only one that they rescheduled) I was called back to the examining room--My incisions (five of them) were checked--important questions were asked and answered--and a trip to the scale was in order! So--drum roll please--after four weeks--I have dropped 30 pounds. I am down 48 pounds since July when I officially started this journey. I must say--I am pleasantly surprised with the success I am having! It has not been easy--but it is getting easier every day. I know the rapid weight loss will slow in a couple of months--and that is fine. I am in this for the long haul and however long it takes--I am willing to be patient. I am just looking forward to the day I can say "I am really healthy.

I was cleared to go back to work tomorrow--Monday. I think I was more excited about that--than the weight loss!! Although I must admit-- I'm a bit apprehensive. I missed the last week of our first semester--but was at least able to say goodbye to those students and explain what was going on. We are just about three weeks into our second semester--and my substitute has had my kids for the entire time. Jumping back in at this point is going to be a challenge--not only for me--but for my students. I've only had one of the kids on my class lists before--so it's going to be quite an adjustment for my classes as I run a pretty tight ship--to say the least! Getting back to a schedule is what I look forward to most! I will be the first the admit--I do not do well with unstructured time--especially if I have an excuse (like pain) to waste it!

Once again--I want to thank everyone for their support. I am sure this would be a very difficult journey to take on my own. The strength I have garnered from each of you--has given me the courage to see this through. Your words of encouragement, cards, letters, e-mails, texts, visits, gifts, flowers etc. are just what I needed--especially during those times that I have questioned my decision and felt discouraged and lonely. I can say without a doubt--I have the best family, circle of friends and colleagues--anyone could ask for!!

****OH YEAH--HOUSE NEWS****We finally have some good news to report--we found out last week that we were put on the builders schedule. We have been told that we will break ground on February 25th!! I am finally getting so excited!! This 17 year dream is finally coming true!

Greg--my wonderful husband--who is a cabinetmaker by trade--is designing and building my cabinets. Every time he shows me a sketch--or asks me questions--it becomes a little more real and I get a little more excited!! All I can say is--I am going to have a kick a$$ kitchen! Oh yea!

 Of course--I am prepared to have February 25 come and go with no movement on our project--thanks to Mother Nature!! However--we do see the end in sight--which makes any postponements tolerable!

Well, I have to go get ready for school tomorrow :-) So until next time...

I'm Still Alive and on the Mend!

My intention when I started this blog--was to do one entry per week--unless something really news worthy had occurred. I didn't want to bore those who were reading it. Well, I'm a slacker!! (No surprise there!!) As the weeks have rolled by--I've just felt that there hasn't been anything very newsworthy happening. I'm healing! I'm also going stir crazy and I want to go back to work! I miss having a regular schedule--I miss my job--I miss my co-workers and most of all--I miss my kids! I am so fortunate to love what I do and to work with such amazing friends, colleagues and students.

I need to take a moment and thank everyone. The outpouring of support that I have received--has rendered me speechless--prayers, phone calls, cards, letters, e-mails, texts, private messages on facebook, comments on my blog, gifts, FLOWERS (oh the flowers--so beautiful)--all of them have aided in my recovery and made a rather painful unpleasant time--so much more bearable! I owe a speedy recovery--to all of you. Thank you for all of it--I'm amazed at the love that has been showered upon me. I am so blessed. Words just can't begin to express how thankful I am for my incredible family, and the wonderful friends and supporters I've been fortunate enough to be surrounded by--My love and appreciation go out to all of you!

My life these past few weeks has been focused so much on food--funny when you think about it---it consumes just about every waking moment--but I can't eat more than 1/4 c. at a meal. It has been quite the learning curve--figuring out what works for me and falls within the limits that have been put upon me with this surgery. I am still eating 800 calories a day and have to get 75+ grams of protein each day. My food is still pureed or "soft" and has to be chewed a million times (a least that what it seems like) 
before it is swallowed. I can't drink with my meals and have to stop consuming liquids 20-30 minutes prior to eating. I can't drink anything for at least an hour after finishing a meal. The reason for limiting liquid before and after is simple--If I drink--it fills my stomach and there won't be room for the small amount of food I need to eat. I am dying for the day I can eat a salad--I think that's still a few months away. I never thought I would crave lettuce, spinach, tomato, cucumber, arugala etc. I miss vegetables. I look forward to the day I can eat more--so that I can fit in protein AND veggies at my meals--I have eaten so few vegetables since surgery--I think it is what I miss the most! By the end of the first year--I should be able to eat 1 cup to 1 1/4 cups of food at each meal. The liquid thing will continue forever--it is taking some getting used to--I have always had water with my meals.

Anyway, on February 1st--I decided that I was going to start walking regularly. That first day--I walked a mile--it wore me out!! I was outside walking on our crazy country roads--in the cold--and just felt like I couldn't get anywhere--it took me almost 25 minutes to walk that mile. On February 2, I decided to go over to school and walk in the building--for those of you who have never seen or been into the high school in which I work--it is sprawling--lots of hallways and lots of steps covering lots of ground! Well, what a difference a controlled environment makes!! I did two miles in 30 minutes (I know--a fifteen minute mile is nothing to brag about--but that's really good for me--considering when I was at my most fit--two years ago--I was struggling to do a twelve minute mile--and I couldn't do two miles back to back at 12 minutes!!) Well to date--that was the extent of my regular walking. We had a major snow that made the roads un-passable and kept me home--and then I had a bit of a set back last week. While I was sleeping on Tuesday night-- the 4th--I rolled over and felt an excruciating pain in my left side. That was the end of my regular walking for a bit. Walking any distance has become extremely painful for me (as has sitting upright in a straight backed chair). I met with my primary care physician and she thinks I probably tore some scare tissue internally. Fingers crossed--I think the pain is starting to lessen and hopefully will be able to head back over to school evenings this week and start again. I am determined to get back into this. One thing I learned through my years involved with Anne Hess--my trainer and the biggest loser/b-fit programs is that diet and exercise work hand and hand for permanent weight loss. I made the decision to have this surgery to get healthy. Without exercise--I will never get to--and maintain the optimum health I am working toward. It is a goal I WILL meet! I am not going to go through all of this--and not reach my goal!!

I truly feel that I have been given a second chance at life with this surgery--I aim to take every advantage of it. I have spent the majority of my life as an observer. Someone on the outside looking in at everyone doing all these great things. Not that I haven't done some great things of my own--I have! However,  now is my chance--at 53--to add to my list of great things! To once again--be a participant. One of the high points of my adult life was completing the Philly Woman's Tri in 2010--the year I turned 50. I came in 665 out of 676. (Which for me was like taking first place or winning the lottery!!) I had two goals--to finish and to not come in last! Well I did it--and I want to do it again. It was such an awesome feeling just completing in that race. I have never been an athlete or competed in anything--at 50 years old--that was a first. Although I wasn't really competing against anyone except myself--the feeling of finishing that race is something I will never forget--having my friends and b-fit family join me just before the finish and run with me to the finish line in support--reduced me to tears.  I had so many people rooting for me and just like with this surgery--encouraging me to continue on--I look forward to doing another triathlon with my tri-buddies and training partners--Lynn Keene and Jen Kieffer.

In support of the changes I will be experiencing this year--my girlfriend Lynn (on the left in the top picture) got me the most thoughtful christmas gift--it is chicken wire with a frame around it and has clothes pins attached to the wire. It has a hook at the bottom and attached to the hook is a little bucket--on the top of the frame in bold letters is written "Bucket List". When she gave it to me she said "I thought you could put down all the things you want to do or all the goals you have set for yourself--and as you complete them--you can take them off and put them in the bucket! Well I started the list and it continues to grow! Next posting I will add a picture of it and post my list!

I meet with my surgeon for my post op appointment on Thursday, Feb. 13. (Keep your fingers crossed that the weather doesn't prevent that!!) I have to have my surgeon's "go ahead" in order to return to work on Monday the 17th. I can't stand the though of staying home any longer! After my appointment on Thursday--I will post how much weight I have lost since my surgery and since I started this journey back in June. I have been staying away from the scale--because my home scale differs from the scale I've been weighed on since the beginning. I am excited to find out the exact numbers. Although I decided before my surgery--I am not going to base my success on the scale. Some one asked me before I had surgery--"How much weight do you plan on losing?" My response was--"I don't know--however much weight I can lose." That was probably not the best answer--as it made me sound as if I hadn't thought about it and had no goal--which was not the case. However--after the question was asked--I thought long and hard about how much I want to lose--I decided I really don't care! I want to have a healthy BMI. A normal weight BMI is between 18.5 and 24.9. Right now--my BMI is embarrassingly high at 50.8--but it will (or has started) heading down in the right direction which is what counts! I don't care how long it takes--I just want it to be in the healthy range. 

Until next time--Peace, Love and Thanks to Everyone! XOXO